The Words Beneath My Fingertips

Just so you know, I'm writing this with a lot of meds pumped in me so it's not very eloquent at all... If you follow me on this blog and/or even on Facebook, you know that I am very open when it comes to talking about NF and the pain it causes me. I talk a LOT about what pain does to me physically. But I don't really talk about what it does to me psychologically. Before my surgery last year, I was dealing with this pain with NO medication. Well, I was taking medicine (Tylenol, etc) but it did nothing for me. So when I wrote about pain, it was often with very explicit language. I was about to give up. I was even suicidal. Nothing was helping me. So now I am on Oxycodone for it. Not every day-- just for the 10-15 days the pain attacks me.  It actually HELPS. So when I have a pain spell,  I know I will get some relief after I take it, even if it's temporary, so I am definitely NOT in as much distress (though the pain is still astronomical so it IS distres